Yes I'm WRONG, but I'm justified
Virtues: meism, biased, playground mentality
I'm sure that you have heard it all before; it something that we used to do habitually as a kid. You know, "I took Tommy's toy because he was mean to me", and so on. We did it then because there was a sense of justification - somebody did me wrong, so it must only be natural to return the favor, right? Well, our teachers and parents sharply criticized for such behavior, I know I've heard it before "Two wrongs don't make a right", "you should know better than that", "don't stoop to their level", and so on. But as we grow and evolve into the person we are destined to be, naturally it would be wise to think that we abandon such behavior, but I think it only gets worse and complex - complex in the sense that we will justify our 'wrongs' based on the situation, and will try to justify our 'wrong' actions as a measured response to something completely unrelated.
For example, my good friend borrowed my classic Nintendo system a couple of years ago and never gave it back, and claims that his nephew has it - which I know is false. My measured response to this is that sometimes he will ask for a ride to go somewhere, I will agree, but I will show up late on purpose ... I don't know why I do this, but I get some sort of satisfaction out of it, even though I know it is wrong. Or, I'm sure that we have all done this at some point, a boss has pissed us off, thus we take solace in taking office supplies or other company items - of course, I have never done this ..... shame on y'all that have!
Its all good when you are the culprit or the person being 'wrong', but when someone is 'wronging' (is that a word?) you, and when they get caught red-handed, it is interesting how deflections start coming up like a blocked shot. For instance, my girl was very rude and feisty in a telephone exchange, when confronted later on about the situation, she knew that she was wrong, but attempted to justify her actions as a response to how I was rude to her, in the past though. I laughed, chuckled, and realized that our playground mentality will always be with us, its really a part of who we are - the only thing that will change, if anything, is that we will find more eloquent ways to justify our behaviors, and provide more psychological/social context to a simple principle:
"Nah nah boo boo, I'm going to get you!"
(to get the pronunciation, say it like you would have said it when you were 7), lol.
Peace,
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6 comments:
Sometimes the only instance an individual has to express themselves regarding past hurt or insult is much later than when the initial insult took place. It may not be justifying by saying that you were rude in the past, it may be a genuine reason that was not expressed previously. For example with the situation with your friend, it happened two years ago but you are still punishing the individual for what they did in the past by not picking them up on time or whatever else, so your girl being "feisty and rude" because you were rude in the past is exactly what you are doing to your friend. As long as you can both admit that you are both perpetuating the eye for eye rule and forgive and forget, then you are better off than most people, because for how long can the eye for eye go on, eventually there will be no more body parts.
I got many body parts to go at it with, with anyone, ya dig?
But, I understand what your saying.
Ya damn right!People tend to use a passive aggressive medium to get back or just get even in such instances for sure.Just use it as inspiration to do great things feel me.My issue is when your best hommie of over 12 years takes ya money from you and then bullys your name around like its nothing, then hes a Pimp and was only looking for you to cake up ya dig.As far as Game systems,you wont get those ones back for sure cause its classic lol. One friend when into my room took a 2grand CK* tuxedo and took games from me and wrapped it as a present hommie then gave it out like that But just apply incuring interest on their "rental" But I've had the same people asking and not returning everything from games to money lent, happens almost like clockwerk. My point is dont lend ninjas Nuthin....PERIOD.lol
I really like this piece. However, what strikes me most is that at the end of this piece, you do exactly what you're complaining about. You say we're (yourself included) wrong for having this naive "playground mentality" but then you justify it by saying that "it will always be with us...it's really a part of who we are.." Your response about you having enough body parts also shows that your 'wrong and strong' attitude is very resistant to change. I guess I'm wondering what the point of this blog was for you personally, other than to elicit empathetic ears with regards to this "good friend" and "rude and feisty" girl of yours (who I'm pretty sure was thrilled to read this).
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